This is my world.-Charis

(manang nest posted this on the bulletin board…and it mirrors the dawn ending the midnight in my life now…it’s really amazing how God can bring hope from the ashes.and when He brings hope, it is a verdant as a plant blossoming from the spring. He brings abundant life from something as black as ashes, coal and dust.)

FOOTPRINTS…A New Version

Imagine you and the Lord Jesus are
walking down the road   together.  For
much of the way, the Lord’s footprints
go along steadily, consistently, rarely
varying the pace.

But your footprints are a disorganized
stream of zigzags, starts, stops,
turnarounds, circles, departures, and
returns.

For much of the way, it seems to go
like this, but gradually your
footprints come more in line with the
Lord’s, soon paralleling His
consistently.

You and Jesus are walking as true
friends!

This seems perfect, but then an
interesting thing happens: Your
footprints that once etched the sand
next to Jesus’ are now walking
precisely in His steps.

Inside His larger footprints are your
smaller ones, you and Jesus are
becoming one.

This goes on for many miles, but
gradually you notice another change.
The footprints  inside the large
footprints seem to grow larger.

Eventually they disappear altogether.
There is only one set of footprints
they have become one.

This goes on for a long time, but
suddenly the second set of footprints
is back. This time it seems even worse!
Zigzags all over the place.   Stops.
Starts. Gashes in the sand.   A
variable mess of prints.

You are amazed and shocked.

Your dream ends. Now you pray:

"Lord, I understand the first scene,
with zigzags and fits.  I was a new
Christian; I was just learning.  But
You walked on through the storm and
helped me learn to walk with You."

"That is correct."

"And when the smaller footprints were
inside of Yours, I was actually
learning to walk in Your steps ,
following You very closely."

"Very good.. You have understood
everything so far."

When the smaller footprints grew and
filled in Yours, I suppose that I was
becoming like You in every way."

"Precisely."

"So, Lord, was there a regression or
something? The footprints separated,
and this time it was worse than at
first."

There is a pause as the Lord answers,
with a smile in His voice.

"You didn’t know?  It was then that we
danced!"

To everything there is a season, a time
for every purpose under heaven: A time
to weep, a time to laugh, A time to
mourn, and a time to dance.

Ecclesiastes 3:1,4.

i feel bad…not physically though…emotionally, spiritually…

the last time i cried was… last night, and the last last time? i don’t know…don’t remember…maybe i’m geeting used to bottling up my emotions when i don’t share my problems with other Christians…i think it wouldn’t be proper to share my own problems when they have personal problems of their own…and some how, my emotions are desensitized…except last night.

and the last time i had my quiet time? when i opened my devotional guide, the ribbon was inserted at the january 25 date…sometimes maybe God has to shout really loud to catch my attention. and maybe, i keep straying voluntarily so His cries fall on my own deaf ears and hard heart….and i just pray that the joy of the salvation He’s given me that was lost will be returned…i have this question though..if you don’t listen to God after He has trying to catch your attention for so many times, will He leave you and turn you away? will He stop listening to your prayers? will He stop working in your life?

i often hide behind my studies,  and i’ve noticed the more i try to make more time to study, sometimes it won’t work that efficiently…like when i didn’t reach the cutoff grade for my major subject’s midterm exam… ok,i better shut up…

i know i want, rather, need someone to listen, but i don’t think someone will or could.and  i also think when you get to the end of this blog entry, you’d think, "pathetic girl…"